The independent newspaper of the University of Iowa community since 1868

The Daily Iowan

The independent newspaper of the University of Iowa community since 1868

The Daily Iowan

The independent newspaper of the University of Iowa community since 1868

The Daily Iowan

Point/Counterpoint | Should you live with your best friend in college?

Coming to college, some people choose to be roommates with strangers, while others choose to live with their best friends. Both can have consequences.
Daniel McGregor-Huyer
(Left to Right) University of Iowa student Nyvaeh Bowen and her boyfriend Isaak Hansen carry a couch during move-in day in Iowa City on Aug. 1, 2022.

Kennedy Lein

Opinions Columnist

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Living with your best friend does come with some benefits, but issues often arise that may result in having to navigate a friendship breakup.

One of the major reasons in my mind that you should not live with your best friend is because you could miss out on meeting new friends, or if you do meet new friends, your best friend could become resentful or jealous.

When first arriving at college, students should avoid living with their best friend in the dorms specifically for that reason. I have heard bad experiences with random roommates during the first year of college, but I have horror stories of living with your best friend. Most of the time, these stories end with the two longtime friends no longer on good terms.

College is a time when you can go out and meet new people and start fresh. If you live with your best friend, it limits your chance of starting new and branching out.

Living with your best friend could also create issues that you have never had to experience before such as different living styles or confrontation about discrepancies between you two.

Living with your best friend can make confrontation awkward because it is probably something you have never had to do while living apart. For example, if you and your best friend live very differently, it may be hard to bring that into a conversation without becoming anxious about how it will affect your friendship.

You should not live with your best friend because it limits your ability to grow as you embark on a new path through life at college. Ultimately, though, you must decide if you and your best friend are compatible and strong enough in your friendship to do so.


Shelley Mishra

Opinions Contributor

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Imagine leaving your friends 8,000 miles away to pursue your degree, adjusting to a new socio-cultural environment, and learning to speak fluently in a second language. This is exactly the experience of an international student who eagerly awaits new friendships to enhance their college experience.

However, the experience of a local student is not very different. They also move away from friends and family to begin a new chapter of their lives in college. Considering the stressors of moving away from home and the transition to college life, one’s interpersonal relationships can be the only medium of support.

This is where the role of a roommate comes into the picture. There are stark differences between living with a stranger we eventually get to know and living with a best friend. If one’s relationship with a roommate is friendly or neutral, the chances of conflict are minimal.

However, when we move in with a person who has a different lifestyle, the chances of conflict only grow. These conflicts could be simple, but stressful for both parties, such as one person being loud when the other is trying to nap, the need for organization in the space, or whose turn it is to throw away the contents of the trash can.

However, living with a best friend, you’d be aware of each other’s habits and tendencies, and willing to cater to each other’s needs. Instead of investing their energy into arguments about organization, sleeping habits, eating habits, and cleanliness, they would take steps to strengthen their relationship.

Living with a best friend also has the additional benefit of providing emotional support. After a tiring day at college, an individual would look forward to going back to their room, unwinding, sharing their ups and downs, enjoying a meal together, and ultimately remaining emotionally and mentally healthy.

Therefore, the struggles of living away from home can be minimized by a friendship, whether it’s a childhood or high school best friend or a stranger who eventually becomes a best friend.

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About the Contributors
Shelley Mishra
Shelley Mishra, Opinions Columnist
Shelley Mishra is a first-year student at the University of Iowa, pursuing her degree in Neuroscience (Hons.).
Daniel McGregor-Huyer
Daniel McGregor-Huyer, Photojournalist/Videographer
Email: [email protected] Daniel McGregor-Huyer is a photojournalist and videographer at The Daily Iowan. He is a senior majoring in cinematic arts with a certificate in disability studies. He has worked with the DI as a photographer and videographer for two years.