The independent newspaper of the University of Iowa community since 1868

The Daily Iowan

The independent newspaper of the University of Iowa community since 1868

The Daily Iowan

The independent newspaper of the University of Iowa community since 1868

The Daily Iowan

Post Pseudo downs Cosmic Brownies in dodgeball tourney

Post Psuedo posted a win in the first round of the intramural men’s dodge-ball tournament Monday night in the Field House, beating Cosmic Brownies 10 games to 7.

Led by some nice moves from junior Derek Parker, Post Pseudo jumped out to an early and formidable 8-2 lead. Parker sealed the first win by jumping over a Cosmic Brownie throw and hurling a return shot in midair that hit his opponent.

“That’s sort of my signature move,” he said.

But the 8-2 advantage didn’t last long.

Cosmic Brownies stormed back to make the score 9-7 before falling in the clinching match.

“We tried to take advantage when we started with two of the three balls,” said junior Bryson Amato of Cosmic Brownies. “But we didn’t, and then got down early trying to figure out our opponent.”

Sophomore Paul Kleen said the squad was too tentative, not exploiting the advantage. Post Pseudo tried a different, more unorthodox strategy.

“We wear football jerseys, and we dominate,” Parker said.

The Post Pseudo squad all sported NFL jerseys, including those of Randy Moss, Jerry Rice, and Jevon Kearse.

Team members said they wear the Moss and Rice jerseys because of the players’ great hands.

However, they caught only one ball during the game, with sophomore Adam Barnett making the reception appropriately attired in the Rice jersey.

All the members of Post Pseudo hailed from City High, and Cosmic Brownies was made up of players from Urbandale High School. However, the team chemistry certainly favored Post Pseudo, which claimed that City High breeds dodge-ball players.

“They’re the best team we’ve played by far,” Kleen said.

The Cosmic Brownies members came into the match confident, but they left the court with a different attitude. Coming up short at the end left the team members exhausted and sucking air like a rotund kid after running a mile.

“Just look at us; we’re cosmic,” Amato said. “We just weren’t so cosmic tonight.”

The squad members said some of the letdown came because of its assorted uniforms — only one player wore the team’s official T-shirt, sophomore Jordan Wagner.

Cosmic Brownies players said they were dominant at dodge ball in high school, but it didn’t help them much in the Field House. While the team has been eliminated from contention, there’s a chance that neither of the squads will play a game later on.

Post Pseudo may have to forfeit its match today because of a class scheduling conflict, leaving the group a player short. With the championship game looming later this week, the team hopes to come up with a solution quickly.

What it has so far may not be the answer.

“We might try to do what Ochocinco did,” Parker said. “You know, bribe the teacher or something.”

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