In seven days, hundreds of millions of Americans will sit down and all eat the exact same food at roughly the same time.

Such behavior would probably seem like one of the strangest cultural phenomenon resulting from the kind of collective consciousness sci-fi movies warn against (or the kind of “groupthink” of which bureaucratic corporations dream). After all, other than some form of telepathic communication, what could cause such a vast number of people to simultaneously stuff their faces with corn, yams, green beans, cranberries, stuffing, and turkey?

My purpose is not to muse about the mysteries of human behavior on a macro scale, though (and I have digressed before I’ve even begun) I want to take this time to talk about one of my favorite family traditions: Thanksgiving breakfast.

Thanksgiving morning, my family always has a huge breakfast — the scale of which is on par with that of Thanksgiving dinner.

It’s not because my family comes from a gluttonous lineage, priding itself on never passing up a chance to eat copious amounts (which may or may not be true). We do it simply out of an understanding of the physics of human anatomy. If you eat a massive amount, it stretches out your stomach.

The stomach’s elasticity is not perfect, however, and it will stay stretched out for several hours — and once your stomach has emptied, this newfound space will allow you to eat considerably more than you may have before. Therefore, we eat a huge breakfast, skip lunch, and can eat a truly insane amount of food once it is dinner time.

This week’s recipe is a simplified version of one of my favorite dishes which my mom makes Thanksgiving morning. Enjoy, and remember, group gluttony isn’t really a sin — it’s just another way to fit in.

— by Tanner Koomar

Apple Fritters

Ingredients:

2 cups pancake mix

Directions:

Combine pancake mix, eggs, and milk. Slice apples into circles. Grease a skillet and heat. Dip apple slices into pancake batter so they are evenly covered and place them on the hot skillet. Flip at least three times, until each fritter is a golden brown. It is easy to undercook them, so make sure they’re plenty done. Sprinkle with white sugar or eat with syrup.