Grace Pateras
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Last week was rough for me. I failed my first math quiz, fell behind in every single one of my classes, and learned a close friend is now facing serious health issues.

Then, I watched myself go viral. Honestly, you probably saw it, too. I’m an Alpha Phi.

The video went viral overnight. It shows the sophomore Alpha Phi pledge class performing parodied versions of popular songs for our new bids. The lyrics referenced other sororities and fraternities on campus, drinking, among other less-than-appropriate topics.

Throughout the week, I overheard people I didn’t know gossiping about the incident between bathroom stalls and felt the judgmental glances from my “friends” around campus. It seemed like everyone wanted to know — was I a part of it?

It didn’t get easier.

I struggled with the desire to tell The Daily Iowan — for which I am an arts reporter — to stop writing about my sorority so the embarrassment could go away faster than I knew it would. After coming to grips with the fact that the video was and is still out there, I realized complaining about the media publishing the truth would go against every ethics lesson I learned in my journalism classes.

The truth is the news can’t be hidden, whether I like it or not. We caused a stir that can’t be undone. Growing up in a technology-driven world, I was always told how fast words can spread over social media, but only the few who it has happened to can know how it affects lives.

Every Alpha Phi responded differently, but there was a common theme. We were all going to be supportive of each other.

I can tell you our late-night talks addressed each of our different emotions. We are upset this blew up so quickly. We hugged each other when tears fell down our cheeks after anonymous girls rolled down their car windows and called us “hoes,” when we walked from campus into our beautiful, national landmark home.

But mostly, I am embarrassed. Though the video is blurry and not all the words we sung are clear, the gist is unmistakable. I was part of a group who was wrongfully chanting about inappropriate behavior, none of which represent the classy, laid-back women that I know we are.

Who we are though, are a group of girls on campus who reached out to every other University of Iowa greek organization and delivered flowers and made phone calls in apology. We owned up to our mistakes, because we know this is not something to take lightly.

However, I truly believe enough is enough. I have seen and appreciate the support we’re getting from other sorority and fraternity members, as well as people not affiliated with greek life. But that’s not to say I don’t notice the miscellaneous negative comments and attitudes from students and even professors.

I’d be lying if I said it didn’t break my heart to hear that our name negatively reflects the UI and its organizations, because I know the video is not who we are or what we represent, therefore it certainly doesn’t represent the UI.

In no way am I ashamed of being an Alpha Phi. I’m proud to call these girls my sisters and look forward to how much closer we grow over the plentiful “sisterhood” outings in our upcoming calendar.

So yes, we make silly raps making mention of other sororities and fraternities on campus, but I hope it’s clear that many of the things said were simply because it rhymed. It was the joke that I believe we took too far. I did it — with others in my pledge class — for the fun, for the sophomore tradition that may or may not be present in other chapters on campus.

Sure, I might not get to attend formal socials for a certain amount of time. I might not get to attend an Alpha Phi Date Party or Formal event this year. But ultimately, that doesn’t change my mind about being an Alpha Phi. I know I’m surrounded by the most supportive group of girls I could ask for, and that’s why I signed up to be in this chapter. That’s why I stuck with it. That’s why I will stick with it.