Power Rankings 

1. Oregon – It’s just having fun. Draw some trees on the football field, please. 
2. Ohio State – Buckeyes weren’t fazed by daytime Beaver Stadium. Who isn’t? 
3. Penn State – Gus Johnson called a Penn State touchdown on what was actually an interception. He couldn’t recognize the Nittany Lions as frauds. 
4. Indiana – Trap game for the Hoosiers with Ohio State on the horizon? I hope not. 
5. Iowa – Is this the Hawkeyes’ peak? 
6. Minnesota – Hold on, what are the Gophers doing here? It’s like they popped out of a hole!
7. Illinois – What happened? Colin must’ve cursed it. 
8. Washington – There’s not even a legitimate top-10 in this conference anymore. 
9. Michigan – Davis Warren, what a comeback! Wolverines could use Cade McNamara. 
10. Wisconsin – Luke Fickell is making the Badgers look, well, fickle. 
11. UCLA – The Bruins know how to win on the road. Take note, Matt Eberflus. 
12. Nebraska – Will a bowl game happen after all? If so, for which car insurance company? 
13. Michigan State – It’s got potential, but not this year. At least there’s tailgating on campus. 
14. Northwestern – Get ready for expensive beer and overpriced food at Wrigley! 
15. USC – Underperforming. Sad. College. 
16. Maryland – Good thing it’s on the road this week. Could be a little busy in D.C. 
17. Rutgers – Scarlet Knights are as disappointing as Christopher Moltisanti. Get it together! 
18. Purdue – Just make a Zach Edey night already. It will cover for the firing of Ryan Walters. 

Matchups 

Rose Bowl Stadium: Iowa (6-3, 4-2) @ UCLA  (3-5, 2-4)

Pasadena, CA 

Where/when to watch: Friday at 8pm. on FOX | Line: Iowa -5.5 | O/U: 44.5 

Maybe this time the Hollywood sign will read “System of a Down.” But then again, Kirk Ferentz could mistake that as telling him to punt on 4th-and-1. 

Ohio Stadium: No. 3 Ohio State (7-1, 4-1) @ Purdue (1-7, 0-5) 

Columbus, OH 

Where/when to watch: Saturday at 11 a.m. on  | Line: Ohio State -38 | O/U: 53.5

This game is as egregious as Machine Gun Kelly and Megan Fox’s couples costume. Know the Star Wars canon! All you have to do is watch nine movies and about seven TV shows. While I’m on my nerd train, I must say “The Acolyte” deserved a second season. 

SHI Stadium: Minnesota (6-3, 4-2) @ Rutgers (4-4, 1-4)

Piscataway, NJ 

Where/when to watch: Saturday at 11 a.m. on NBC | Line: Minnesota -6 | O/U: 46.5

NBC on the broadcast for an 11 a.m. kickoff? It’s no longer Big Ten Saturday Night. Instead, it’s Big Ten Mediocre Midmorning.  

Memorial Stadium: Michigan (5-4, 3-3) @ No. 8 Indiana (9-0, 6-0)

Bloomington, IN 

Where/when to watch: Saturday at 2:30 p.m. on CBS | Line: Indiana -14 | O/U: 49.5 

Credit Coach Cignetti for not endorsing smoking. But with a bunch of Hoosier frat guys, that’s like talking to a brick wall. 

Autzen Stadium: Maryland (4-4, 1-4) @ No. 1 Oregon (9-0, 6-0)

Eugene, OR

Where/when to watch: Saturday at 6 p.m. on BTN| Line: Oregon -25  | O/U: 57.5

The Ducks are just as dangerous as the gargantuan hat Chappell Roan wore on SNL. Just the slightest movement can take someone’s head off. Stay in your shells, Terrapins. 

Beaver Stadium: Washington (5-4, 3-3) @ No. 6 Penn State (7-1, 4-1)

University Park, PA

Where/when to watch: Saturday at 7 p.m. on Peacock | Line: Penn State -14 | O/U: 46.5

Which will be more damaged: that terrible Penn State fan’s phone or the pride of the Huskies after this game?