It may not be Earth-shattering when that guy from Slater Seven tweets about his morning breakfast, but what’s Twitter good for if not for keeping up with every mundane thought and detail of our favorite celebrities’ lives? Each Friday, we’ll compile a list of the best celebrity tweets of the week for our collective voyeuristic pleasure.

rainnwilson: I’d watch “Dancing with the Stars” if certain stars were on it: Abe Vigoda. Stephen Hawking. Carrot Top. Manut Bol. Janet Reno. Amy Winehouse.

nicolerichie: Went into Harlow’s room, where she had been alone with her father. She said three new words … “Army,” “Samurai,” & “Asia” … Ummmmm?

johncmayer: I wonder if someday when I’m married I’ll have sex with my wife and then out of habit check to make sure she didn’t steal my watch.

mindykaling: My morning was written and directed by the Coen Bros. … and my night’ll be produced by Vivid Entertainment. Ohhhh yeeeeaaahh.

SarahKSilverman: Going to see (Inglourious Basterds right now!! Jews with guns!! I hope they kill Hitler!